..and I thought how liking a boy was just the same as believing you wanted to know a secret - everything was better when you were denied and could feel tormented by curiousity or loneliness. But the moment of something happening was treacherous. It was just so tiring to have to worry about whether your face was peeling, or to have to laugh at stories that weren't funny.
The narrator reflects on the complexities of young love, comparing it to the desire to uncover a hidden truth. There’s a thrill in yearning and the intricate emotions of curiosity and solitude, suggesting that the anticipation of affection can sometimes feel more rewarding than the affection itself.
However, when love turns into reality, it becomes burdensome. The pressure of constantly worrying about one's appearance and pretending to enjoy mundane situations drains the excitement. This juxtaposition illustrates the struggles of adolescence and the challenges of navigating emotions in a social environment.
