Emma says her illness was a kind of self-hypnosis which obliterated the outside world, a way of escaping life and reducing its proportions to what she could manage.
In the book "To Die For" by Carol Lee, Emma reflects on her illness as a form of self-hypnosis that allowed her to retreat from reality. This condition helped her to filter out the chaos of the outside world and cope with life's overwhelming aspects. By focusing inward, Emma found a way to manage her emotional and mental burdens.
Her perspective suggests that her illness was not merely a physical ailment but a psychological refuge that offered her a semblance of control. It highlights the desire to escape life's pressures and illustrates how one's mental state can influence their experience of reality.