Exhausted, hardly knowing what she was doing, she came the last three steps and sat, took the man in her arms, actually held him, gazing out of her smudged eyes down the stairs, back into the morning. She felt wetness against her breast and saw that he was crying again. He hardly breathed but tears came as if being pumped. I can't help, she whispered, rocking him, I can't help. It was already too many miles to Fresno.
In this scene from "The Crying of Lot 49," the protagonist is depicted in a state of exhaustion, reflecting her emotional turmoil and disorientation. She reaches the last few steps of her journey and collapses in a moment of vulnerability, cradling a man she seems to be intimately connected with. Her blurry vision suggests a deep-seated pain and a disconnection from her surroundings as she stares out, indicating an ongoing struggle within herself.
The man she holds is overwhelmed with grief, as evidenced by his tears that flow incessantly despite his shallow breathing. The woman's effort to comfort him reveals her own helplessness, as she softly expresses her inability to ease his suffering. The reference to being "too many miles to Fresno" hints at a sense of distance, perhaps both physically and emotionally, emphasizing the challenges they face in their relationship and their journey through life.