Goods and chattel. The words from the leather book came into my head. We were like the gold leaf mirror and the horse saddle. Not full-fledge people. I didn't believe this, never had believed it a day of my life, but if you listen to white folks long enough, some sad, beat-down part of you starts to wonder. All that pride about what we were worth left me then. For the first time, I felt the hurt and shame of just being who I was. After a while, I went down to the cellar. When mauma saw my raw eyes, she said, Ain't nobody can write down in a book what you worth.
The narrative reflects on the feelings of worthlessness and dehumanization that can arise from societal perceptions. The speaker compares themselves to objects like gold leaf mirrors and horse saddles, revealing a struggle with their identity and value as a person. This inner conflict stems from being influenced by the perspectives of white society, leading to feelings of pride's erosion and shame about their existence.
During a vulnerable moment, the speaker retreats to a quiet space, where they encounter love and wisdom from a maternal figure. Her assertion that one's worth cannot be captured in a book serves as a powerful reminder that true value lies within, not in external validation. This interaction hints at a journey toward reclaiming self-worth amidst societal oppression.