The protagonist is grappling with a profound sense of discontent, struggling with internal turmoil as he reflects on his life and responsibilities. He feels overwhelmed, realizing that he is ignoring his own emotional needs while chasing after elusive answers about the slayers of the dead. This tension reveals a conflict between facing the harsh realities of his work and the desire to escape his current existence.

In a fleeting moment of clarity, he grapples with a powerful urge to abandon everything. His longing to flee represents a yearning for a fresh start, free from the burdens that weigh him down. This internal struggle highlights the theme of disconnection between the living and the dead as he tries to navigate his tumultuous journey while grappling with his own suppressed feelings.