He felt as if he were being violently emptied out, as if a big magnet were pulling his blood and fluids down into the earth. He was weeping again, unstoppably, his head like the chandelier in his grandparents' house in Buffalo, the one that was too high for them to reach and that every time he visited had one fewer bulb alight. His head was an old chandelier, going dark.
The protagonist experiences an overwhelming sense of loss and despair, feeling as though his very essence is being drawn out of him, akin to liquid being pulled from his body. This emotional turmoil manifests in tears that seem uncontrollable, highlighting his deep sadness and disconnection from his surroundings.
The imagery of his head resembling a chandelier in his grandparents' house underscores his feelings of fading vitality and mental decline. As the chandelier loses bulbs over time, so does he feel himself dimming and becoming less whole, suggesting a poignant metaphor for the passage of time and the gradual loss of hope and clarity in his life.
