He owned an expensive camera that required thought before you pressed the shutter, and I quickly became his favorite subject, round-faced, missing teeth, my thick bangs in need of a trim. They are still the pictures of myself I like best, for they convey that confidence of youth I no longer possess, especially in front of a camera.

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The narrator reflects on a relationship with someone who owned a high-quality camera, highlighting the care and deliberation needed before taking a photograph. As a favorite subject, the narrator describes herself with a childlike charm, characterized by her round face and missing teeth, along with her unruly bangs. These images capture a unique essence of youthful confidence that she feels she has lost as she grew older.

The photographs stand out as cherished memories, evoking a time when self-assuredness came more naturally. The narrator's nostalgia reveals her complex feelings about aging and self-image, particularly in relation to being photographed. These moments serve as a reminder of a carefree time, contrasting sharply with her current insecurities.

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February 25, 2025

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