I think we are well advised to keep on nodding terms with the people we used to be, whether we find them attractive company or not. Otherwise they turn up unannounced and surprise us, come hammering on the mind's door at 4 a.m. of a bad night and demand to know who deserted them, who betrayed them, who is going to make amends. We forget all too soon the things we thought we could never forget. We forget the loves and the betrayals alike, forget what we whispered and what we screamed, forget who we were.
by Joan Didion
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In Joan Didion's work, she emphasizes the importance of maintaining a connection with our past selves. She suggests that if we ignore or distance ourselves from who we once were, these aspects of our identity can resurface unexpectedly and create turmoil in our lives. This internal conflict manifests as a haunting reminder of unresolved issues, such as betrayals and unfulfilled feelings, that demand attention in our minds, particularly during vulnerable moments.

Didion warns that we often forget significant experiences, both positive and negative, over time. By neglecting our past relationships and emotions, we risk losing a part of ourselves. Acknowledging our history allows us to integrate those experiences into our present, rather than having them intrude upon us when we least expect it. Embracing our former selves can lead to a deeper understanding of who we are today.

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January 29, 2025

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