I want to be the kind of boy you are, thought Bean. But I don't want to go through what you've been through to get there.
In "Ender's Shadow" by Orson Scott Card, the character Bean reflects on his aspirations and the qualities he admires in another boy. He desires to emulate this boy's strengths and character but is apprehensive about the hardships that shaped him. This internal conflict highlights Bean's recognition that greatness often comes at a cost and his reluctance to endure similar challenges to achieve his goals.
Bean's thoughts reveal a deep yearning for personal growth without the accompanying pain and struggle. His contemplation illustrates the complexities of ambition and the desire to forge one's own identity, seeking success while wishing to bypass the sacrifices others have made. This sentiment resonates with anyone striving to better themselves while grappling with the realities of their past experiences.