In Joyce Carol Oates' "DIS MEM BER and Other Stories of Mystery and Suspense," the author explores the complex dynamics of emotional pain in relationships. She suggests that when a person is hurt and expresses that pain, it creates a lasting impression on the other party. The act of vulnerability, such as locking eyes after being hurt, can leave a person vulnerable to continued abuse, as they are seen as someone who can be hurt repeatedly.

This statement underscores the psychological repercussions of emotional trauma, revealing how it can define a person's identity in the eyes of their partner. The hurt individual becomes associated with their pain, making it harder for healing to occur. Oates captures the tension between vulnerability and power dynamics, highlighting the struggles that arise when love is intertwined with suffering.