It did not seem possible that Wendy Wright had been born out of blood and internal organs like other people. In proximity to her he felt himself to be a squat, oily, sweating, uneducated nurt whose stomach rattled and whose breath wheezed. Near her he became aware of the physical mechanisms which kept him alive; within him machinery, pipes and valves and gas-compressors and fan belts had to chug away at a losing task, a labor ultimately doomed. Seeing her face, he discovered that his own consisted of a garish mask; noticing her body made him feel like a low-class wind-up toy.

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In Philip K. Dick's "Ubik," the character experiences a profound sense of inadequacy when in the presence of Wendy Wright. He perceives her as almost ethereal, contrasting sharply with his own physicality, which he feels is base and mechanical. This self-awareness highlights his perception of being a mere machine, struggling with the mundane limitations of life. Wendy represents an ideal that feels unattainable to him, heightening his sense of inferiority.

This stark comparison leads him to reflect on his own existence. He views himself as a low-class, crude version of a human being, while Wendy embodies an idealized form of beauty and grace. The metaphor of internal machinery serves to emphasize his feelings of alienation and the existential dread that accompanies the realization of one's mortality and limitations. Ultimately, the encounter deepens his internal conflict and pushes him to confront his own inadequacies.

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January 24, 2025

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