It makes me angry sometimes, it's a visceral thing--how you come to despise your own words in your ears not because they aren't genuine, but because they are; because you've said them so many times, your 'principles,' your 'ideals'--and so damned little in the world has changed because of them.
In Joyce Carol Oates’ book "Black Water," the speaker expresses a deep frustration with the redundancy of their own beliefs. This sentiment comes from the realization that, despite articulating their values repeatedly, the world remains largely unchanged. This disillusionment highlights a conflict between personal principles and the static nature of the surrounding reality.
The speaker's anger stems from an internal struggle; they grapple with the authenticity of their convictions while feeling increasingly disheartened by their ineffectiveness. The powerful emotions conveyed emphasize the difficulty of maintaining hope and meaning in the face of persistent societal inertia, showcasing the profound impact of repeated disappointment on one’s sense of purpose.
