It may have been the light at 5:36 on a June evening or it may have been the smell of dust combined with sprinkler water or the sound of the neighbour kid screaming I'll kill you but suddenly it was like I was dying, the way I missed her. Like I was swooning, like I was going to fall over and pass out. It was like being shot in the back. It was such a surprise, but not a very good one. And then it went away. The way it does. But it exhausted me, like a seizure.

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In this excerpt from "A Complicated Kindness" by Miriam Toews, the narrator describes a sudden intense feeling of longing or emotional pain that strikes unexpectedly. It could be triggered by a simple sensory detail like light, dust, or sounds from the neighborhood, but it leaves a profound impact, making the narrator feel as though they are dying or about to pass out, similar to the shock of being shot.

"It was such a surprise, but not a very good one. And then it went away. The way it does. But it exhausted me, like a seizure." This highlights the fleeting yet overwhelming nature of the emotional experience, leaving the narrator drained. The passage captures the depth of sudden emotional vulnerability and its physical toll.

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May 16, 2025

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