- Might it console you to know that I expect nothing but torture from her return? That I regard you as a bird of paradise? She shook her head. - That my admiration for you is painfully strong? - I want Van – she cried – and not intangible admiration. - Intangible? You goose. You my gauge it, you may brush it once very lightly with the knuckles of you gloved hand. I said knuckles. I said once. That will do. I can't kiss you. Not even your burning face. Good-bye, pet. Tell Edmond to take a nap after he returns. I shall need him at two in the morning.

📖 Vladimir Nabokov

🌍 American  |  👨‍💼 Novelist

🎂 April 22, 1899  –  ⚰️ July 2, 1977
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In a conversation marked by emotional intensity, one character expresses an expectation of pain upon the return of another, revealing the complicated dynamics of admiration and desire. Despite her profound feelings, she feels that mere admiration lacks substance and does not satisfy her deeper longing for a person she desperately wants, indicating a conflict between intellectual appreciation and heartfelt need.

The other character, however, attempts to temper her longing with a mix of affection and playful teasing. He acknowledges his admiration but finds it necessary to distance himself from physical intimacy, proposing that a simple, fleeting touch might suffice. This dynamic showcases a tension between romantic ideals and the harsh realities of emotional connection, ultimately leading to a bittersweet farewell anchored in unfulfilled longing.

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March 22, 2025

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