The character grapples with a profound sense of loss and regret, questioning why the pain of missing someone intensifies only after they are gone. There is an intense fear that comes with the realization of loss, leading to a suffocating dread that morphs into a fear of life's futility without the loved one. This turmoil consumes him, leaving him feeling empty and abandoned.
The narrative highlights the depth of emotional struggle, illustrating how the absence of a loved one can trigger existential despair. The fear of an irreparable void in life due to this loss leads to feelings of being lost and hopeless, emphasizing the character's vulnerability and profound sadness in the face of grief.