So this is love, he said to himself, trying to examine his own overwhelming feelings with the rational fragment of his mind. This is the powerful, horrible longing that made Mother marry that miserable tyrant I had to call Father. How many unbelievably stupid heroes in stories did insanely dangerous things because they were in love? More to the pint, how many insane things am I going to do because of it?
The protagonist reflects on the nature of love, grappling with the intense emotions it stirs within him. He analyzes his feelings through a lens of reason, recalling the powerful longing that drove his mother to marry his abusive father. This connection to his family history weighs heavily on his mind as he contemplates the toll of love on decision-making.
He questions the reckless actions of heroes in stories who often act foolishly due to love, pondering the dangerous paths he might take because of his own feelings. This introspection reveals a deep conflict between emotion and reason, illustrating love's duality as both a beautiful and destructive force in his life.
