In "A Tokyo Romance: A Memoir," Ian Buruma explores the concept of human relationships in Japan through the lens of the terms "wet" and "dry." The Japanese word for "wet" denotes the intricate web of mutual obligations and interdependencies that characterize collective life, exemplified by traditional family ties and the bonds within Yakuza gangs. These relations highlight the emphasis on community and collective responsibility in Japanese culture.

In contrast, Buruma identifies the qualities of being "dry" with a more individualistic Western approach to life, marked by emotional detachment. He juxtaposes the characteristics of Terayama Shuji, representing a dry persona, with Kara, who embodies the wet essence of human connection. This exploration sheds light on the complexities of cultural identities and the varying degrees of intimacy and obligation that define relationships in different societies.