The more time she is spending around people, the more she discovers of her own character failures. In the cottage she was generous, she was kind, she was positive. In this world new sides of her are emerging and she doesn't like it. She thought she was a better person than this.
The protagonist in Cecelia Ahern's "Lyrebird" grapples with self-discovery as she interacts more with others. Initially, within the sanctuary of her cottage, she sees herself as generous, kind, and positive. This self-perception serves as a comforting narrative about her character. However, as she enters a more social environment, she starts to confront uncomfortable truths about herself.