They cramp around our wounds-the pain from our childhood, the losses and disappointments of adulthood, the humiliations suffered in both-to keep us from getting hurt in the same place again, to keep foreign substances out. So those wounds never have a chance to heal. Perfectionism is one way our muscles cramp. In some cases we don't even know that the wounds and the cramping are there, but both limit us.
Anne Lamott, in her book "Bird by Bird," illustrates how our emotional wounds from childhood and adulthood create barriers in our lives. These wounds can manifest as perfectionism, where our inner selves tighten to protect us from further pain. This cramping serves to guard against new hurt but ultimately prevents true healing. By avoiding the vulnerability that comes with addressing these pains, we become limited both personally and creatively.
Lamott emphasizes that many of us may not even recognize the presence of these emotional injuries or the associated constraints. Perfectionism can act as a form of self-protection, but it restricts our growth and ability to fully engage. Acknowledging these cramping mechanisms is crucial for healing and achieving a more authentic life. Facing and addressing these painful experiences allows us the opportunity to heal and expand beyond our self-imposed limitations.
