This daily headache in the opaque air of this tombal jail is disturbing, but I must persevere. Have written more than a hundred pages and not got anywhere yet. My Calender is getting confused. That must have been around August 15, 1947. Don't think I can go on. Heart, head--everything. Lolita, Lolita, Lolita, Lolita, Lolita, Lolita, Lolita, Lolita, Lolita. Repeat til page is full, printer.
The narrator expresses a deep sense of despair while trapped in a suffocating environment, resembling a prison. Despite the discomfort, they are determined to keep writing. However, their efforts yield more than a hundred pages without meaningful progress, leading to confusion about time—specifically around August 15, 1947. The struggle weighs heavily on them, both mentally and emotionally.
The incessant repetition of "Lolita" conveys a fixation or obsession that dominates their thoughts, illustrating a turbulent relationship with the subject of their writing. This relentless chant serves as both a coping mechanism and a reflection of their inability to escape their current predicament, marking a profound internal conflict as they grapple with their creative challenges.