This passage illustrates the inner turmoil of a man who, despite his typical calm demeanor, experiences a profound moral crisis. He grapples with intense feelings of guilt and regret for his past decisions, reflecting on the cumulative weight of his mistakes. His self-reproach indicates a deep awareness of his limitations and the foolishness of his choices, revealing a sense of despair about his life's direction.

This struggle highlights the universal human experience of confronting one’s flaws and the sometimes overwhelming burden of self-reflection. The man's anguish underscores the tension between the chaos of existence and our desire to assume control over it, suggesting that he is not only battling with his past but also with the very nature of life itself, which often feels unpredictable and beyond individual influence.