When I was younger, imagining age, I would think, Maybe you appreciate things more when you don't have much time left. I forgot to include the loss of energy. Some days I do appreciate things more, eggs, flowers, but then I decide I'm only having an attack of sentimentality, my brain going pastel Technicolor, like a beautiful-sunset greeting cards they used to make so many of in California. High-gloss hearts. The danger is grayout.
The passage reflects on the relationship between aging and appreciation for life's simple pleasures. The speaker recalls a youthful perspective that linked a limited timeframe with a heightened sense of gratitude. However, they realize that aging also brings a decline in energy, which complicates the experience of appreciation. While they occasionally find joy in small things like eggs and flowers, they question whether these moments of appreciation stem from genuine feeling or merely sentimentality.
The mention of "pastel Technicolor" and "high-gloss hearts" suggests a contrast between vibrant emotions and the potential dullness of reality, hinting at a fear of losing depth in life's experiences. This tension highlights the risks of becoming emotionally numb or detached as one ages. The reference to the "danger of grayout" implies that as time passes, the vibrancy of life could fade away, underscoring the struggle to maintain meaningful connections amidst the challenges of aging.
