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Category: funny
Quotes of Category: funny
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  1. Bill Watterson _ Homicidal Psycho Jungle Cat

    I say if a novelty Christmas song is funny one time, then it is funny every time. - Calvin
    book-quotefunnysongcalvin-and-hobbes

  2. Tamara Thorne _ The Sorority: Samantha

    Malory! You've got a chipmunk on your pussy!
    book-quotehumorfunnyhumorous

  3. Anne Stuart _ The Devil's Waltz

    I lied. I do that, you know, when it suits me. I would have thought you'd realized that by now.
    book-quotefunny

  4. Phyllis Reynolds Naylor _ Alice on the Outside

    I sure wasn't going to ask Aunt Sally, because if she told me once that getting your period was like a moth becoming a butterfly, she'd probably say that sexual intercourse was like a deer getting antlers or something.
    book-quotefunnysexgirl

  5. Phyllis Reynolds Naylor _ The Grooming of Alice

    Do we have a hand mirror?' I asked from the kitchen doorway.'Never use one,' said Lester, examining the date on a carton of sour cream.'Naturally, you're a male. What you see is what you've got,' I said resentfully.'Huh?' said Lester.
    book-quoteweirdfunnywoman

  6. Phyllis Reynolds Naylor _ Alice on the Outside

    Sexually active? Sexually ? Patrick and I hadn't even learned the fine points of kissing yet!I marched on down. 'For your information,' I said from the doorway, as both Dad and Lester jerked to attention, 'I am about as sexually active as a bag of spinach, and if you want to keep me on the porch and not out in the park somewhere behind the bushes, you'll keep the stupid porch light off when I come home with a boy.
    book-quoteloveoutragefunny

  7. Phyllis Reynolds Naylor _ Alice on the Outside

    The world is full of unrequited love,' I said finally.'You and Patrick having problems?' Dad said, reaching around to get the butter out of the fridge.'No, I was just wondering what you would say if I was a lesbian.''Come again?' said Lester. 'I'm having a hard time following this conversation.
    book-quotelovefunnyfamily

  8. Marissa Meyer _ Winter

    I passed out from stress? That's it?""I believe the princess term is fainted," said Thorne.
    book-quotefunnythorne

  9. Charles Bukowski _ You Get So Alone at Times That

    I paid, got up, walkedto the door, openedit.I heard the mansay, "that guy'snuts."out on the street Iwalked northfeelingcuriouslyhonored.
    book-quotelifesouldeath

  10. Charles Bukowski _ You Get So Alone at Times That

    sometimes when everything seems at its worst when all conspires and gnaws and the hours, days, weeks years seem wasted – stretched there upon my bed in the dark looking upward at the ceiling i get what many will consider an obnoxious thought: it's still nice to be Bukowski.
    book-quotefunnyegoirony

  11. Charles Bukowski _ You Get So Alone at Times That

    girlsplease give yourbodies and yourlivestothe young menwhodeserve thembesidesthere isno wayI would welcometheintolerabledullsenseless hellyou would bringmeandI wish youluckin bedandoutbut notinminethankyou.
    book-quotelovelifedeath

  12. Charles Bukowski _ Hot Water Music

    What is your advice to young writers?" "Drink, fuck and smoke plenty of cigarettes.
    book-quotewritinghumorsarcasm
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