Grieving, like being blind, is a strange business; you have to learn how to do it. We seek company in mourning, but after the early bursts of tears, after the praises have been spoken, and the good days remembered, and the lament cried, and the grave closed, there is no company in grief. It is a burden borne alone.

Grieving, like being blind, is a strange business; you have to learn how to do it. We seek company in mourning, but after the early bursts of tears, after the praises have been spoken, and the good days remembered, and the lament cried, and the grave closed, there is no company in grief. It is a burden borne alone.

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Grief is one of the most profound and personal experiences a person can endure. It often begins with a flurry of external support—friends gathering, words of comfort, shared tears—which provides initial relief and a sense of collective understanding. Nonetheless, as time progresses and the immediate shock wanes, grief becomes less about outward support and more about an intimate journey that each individual must navigate alone. The analogy of grieving as being blind captures this sense of uncertainty, confusion, and the challenge of adapting to a new reality without the guiding light of the lost loved one. Learning how to grieve resembles learning to see again—there's no instruction manual, and what works for one person may not work for another. This process involves confronting painful memories, accepting feelings of emptiness, and gradually finding a way to live anew despite the unchangeable loss.

It's important to recognize that grief doesn't follow a predictable timeline or pattern. While initial displays of mourning might call for societal support, deep healing often requires solitude and introspection. The quote emphasizes the solitary nature of mourning—the burden of grief is not one we can abandon, nor one others can fully shoulder for us. In this solitude, there's a paradox—the need for companionship is instinctual and comforting initially, but true healing often depends on embracing the loneliness that follows. There is value in understanding this process, accepting that experiencing grief in one's own manner and timeframe is both natural and necessary. This recognition can ultimately foster patience, compassion, and resilience as one reconciles with loss and begins to rediscover life beyond sorrow.

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July 24, 2025

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