The quote reflects a deep sense of alienation and self-doubt experienced by the speaker. They struggle with their identity and sense of worth, feeling that they do not hold the same value as others do. This lack of self-credibility leads to a feeling of disconnection from their own life, as if they are merely playing a role rather than living authentically.

This perception of life as a performance impacts the speaker's emotional state, suggesting a fundamental difference between their experience and that of others. They articulate a longing for the intrinsic connection to life's reality that seems absent in their existence, highlighting a profound existential crisis.