The ways we are taught to be a girl start when you are very young. When you are being taught, you don't know about the points. When you are being taught to be a girl, the lessons are simply accepted-the price you pay for your curves, your holes. It's only later, when you are older, after you've been taught, that you find out about the score sheet.
From a young age, girls are socialized to accept certain expectations and behaviors tied to their gender. Initially, these lessons about femininity are absorbed without question, as children are not aware of the underlying implications or biases involved. The teachings regarding how to embody femininity become a part of their identity as they navigate growing up.
As girls mature, they start to recognize the societal 'score sheet' detailing the costs of these lessons, including the pressures and sacrifices associated with their gender. This realization highlights the burden of conforming to gender norms and the complexities of womanhood in a culture that often enforces rigid roles. Roxane Gay’s observations in "Not That Bad: Dispatches from Rape Culture" illustrate the profound impact of these early teachings on a girl's understanding of her value and identity.