You cannot do any more for me," I said. "Since I have begun to depend on you I feel weaker than ever before. I have disappointed you by acting neurotically at the very moment when I should have shown the wisdom of your guidance. I don't want to ever come back to you. I feel that I must go and work and live and forget about all this.
In this excerpt from Anaïs Nin's diary, the narrator reflects on their dependency on another person, expressing a sense of personal weakness that has arisen from this reliance. Despite having received guidance, there is a feeling of disappointment in oneself for not acting wisely when it mattered most. This self-criticism highlights a conflict between the desire for support and the need for independence.
The narrator expresses a strong desire to break free from this dependency, stating a need to move on with life, work, and focus on personal growth. There is a clear determination to leave behind the emotional turmoil caused by this relationship, as they believe that distancing themselves is essential for their own well-being and strength. This desire to "forget about all this" suggests a significant shift towards self-empowerment and introspection.
